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Youth Group: The State of Indiana asked us not to come back?

Blog with Pat-n-Lou

After almost meeting death going to the mall, things had calmed down a bit. We headed back to the hotel and went to lunch. During lunch, Father David and Paula sat with us. We discussed the upcoming workshops and plans for the evening.

We made it through the day and hung out in our room. We had several visitors. So many actually, that both rooms were packed. We kept it low key. Just playstation and food. As people funneled out about 1am, a few stragglers stayed and hung out. These stragglers were women from a different area.

During our conversations, one of the women said we should just have a party our last night in Indianapolis. That sounded good to us. We talked about food, who to invite and how to pull this off without getting caught. It wouldn’t be much different than the night we just had. The one…

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Youth Group: The State of Indiana asked us not to come back?

After almost meeting death going to the mall, things had calmed down a bit. We headed back to the hotel and went to lunch. During lunch, Father David and Paula sat with us. We discussed the upcoming workshops and plans for the evening.

We made it through the day and hung out in our room. We had several visitors. So many actually, that both rooms were packed. We kept it low key. Just playstation and food. As people funneled out about 1am, a few stragglers stayed and hung out. These stragglers were women from a different area.

During our conversations, one of the women said we should just have a party our last night in Indianapolis. That sounded good to us. We talked about food, who to invite and how to pull this off without getting caught. It wouldn’t be much different than the night we just had. The one woman says “If we could get a bottle or two that would be awesome!”.

There we were. In a strange city, at a youth group youth rally, everyone is underage and the odds were against us to be able to pull this off. “I am sure we will figure this out.” I said. She says “I hope so” and kisses me, which was completely unexpected.

The women left and I asked ” Um, what was that?”. John replied “Your girlfriend?” “Nope! Alright, we have to figure this out, who has ideas?” I said. After some debate, we have nothing. Then it happened. A guy from another area had a cousin who was legal to buy alcohol. So, after some agreed upon significant purchase and delivery fees, the party is on.

The next morning when we woke up, I started feeling under the weather, but we continued on. Some seminars, some workshops, lunch and dinner took us to the evening where are plan to just relax. We had so many visitors, it was impossible to relax. People coming and going. Women hanging out with us. They started to become a little possessive. Sitting with me or John or Lou or the other guys. Sitting on our laps, holding our hands and just making it known they had “claimed” us. We all just asked when they left what was happening and John says “Are they our girlfriends?” “No” I responded.

The morning of the last night had come. The alcohol gets dropped off. I felt worse this day than the day before. We packed up what we don’t want to lose or leave, except for the playstation, and we make our way through the day. John wasn’t feeling real great either, but the rest of the guys were just excited to party.

We get through the last day of events and get to our room. As about 8pm hit, I tell the guys I am going to lay down because I don’t feel well and just need some rest. I passed out and probably would have slept soundly through the night. I did sleep through the party.

This was Lou and or John from what I heard.

Suddenly, I was woke up with a light being flashed in my eyes. I covered my eyes with my arm. My arm got held down and here came the light again. I covered my eyes with my other arm. Then that arm was being held down also as the light came again.

At that point, I got mad. Very very mad. I sat straight up and yelled at whoever was there. “You need to leave me the f&%# alone. I am just trying to sleep and if you touch me again I am going to f’n lose it!” I rolled back over, pulled the covers over my head and lay back down. Looking back on it, I should have opened my eyes when I sat up.

So, the police were the light shiners. I was apparently unresponsive and they were checking my vitals. They were called because during the party, there was a alcohol related incident and wanted to ensure I was not influenced by alcohol. The kicker to this was they got John first.

My reaction was a horrible way to greet the police. The covers came flying off and I hear Father David from the background say “Pat, sit up and answer his questions please. There has been an incident.” I sat up and pleaded my case. I was sick. I was tired. I didn’t drink anything. (Which they only believed after 15 other people said I hadn’t drank.) and I just want to sleep.

I slept through one party and here was the outcome. How does this even happen?

They asked who bought the alcohol. “What alcohol?” was the wrong answer, but that was the one I gave. After getting yelled at a bit and them dismissing the ambulance they had dispatched for me, the police let me lay back down and I was out. I heard some questioning before I passed out and it seemed like John was taking the most of it. I felt bad, but I really didn’t feel well and I was so tired.

The next morning, I was even sicker and I had sweat all night. We were all concerned for the people involved in the unfortunate incident the night before and really were worried if we were in trouble. We were asked by the authorities to not come back to the state of Indiana until we were adults. I skipped breakfast and we all jumped on the bus.

The ride home was quiet for everyone and I slept. We stopped in Medina, Ohio for food and everyone got off the bus, but me. John had tried to wake me and that was a no go. Father David tried and got me to open my eyes, but I was unresponsiveness.


With being sick and hypoglycemic, I didn’t eat and was severely dehydrated. I wouldn’t drink the orange juice and was just completely out of it. So, the chaperones called the ambulance and my parents. I ended up at the hospital and went through a couple IV bags on the ways there. I got there, was rehydrated, had some food to raise my sugar and was given an antibiotic. My parents came to pick me up and I slept for a couple days. I got up for food and the restroom and that was about it.

This was a terrible ending to an awesome trip. Everyone lived which was great, but it almost got to the point where we had too much fun. Several lessened learned for the next trip! If we were allowed to join that was.

Indiana’s message to us.

Youth Group: The pizza, the mall and certain death?

Now when we were growing up, we didn’t live in the country or in mansions. We grew up in the city. Most of us went to public schools and there were always fights, drugs and other bad things going on. We mostly kept out of trouble, but that was largely due to an amazing priest at our church, Father David.

We did not call him that though. It was always Father (insert last name). We were kids and he was our elder, so we all showed him immense respect. He absolutely kept us out of trouble and taught us some carpentry as well as how to respect others.

I don’t think he knows how he impacted our lives forever, but without a doubt, without his influence, we could have been in with the wrong crowds who are all mostly in jail or passed away now. Those were the people we grew up with.

I write the rest of this knowing how much respect we have for him, but also we were kids who wanted to have fun. So, he introduced us to the concept of a church youth group. It was amazing! Kids gathering together to go to outings with other kids with common interests! Who ever thought that up is a genius!

Our first real trip was to Indianapolis, Indiana. There was a National Youth Rally. We had to go to this event! We did fund raisers. We begged our parents. We helped out at church. Anything we could do, we did. The only catch – We needed chaperones. Father David may have volunteered or our parents begged him to take us, that’s unclear still to this day, but we had at least one and when he told us I don’t think any of us were disappointed. This is going to be awesome!

So we planned and found out some interesting facts.

  • Lou and I have family from the middle of our state in a tiny little town that are going. Third cousins who were female (which means they had friends too!)
  • Women at these rallies out numbered men 3:2.
  • We shared a room with our friends, without an adult.
  • We have free time when we are there.

There were several other things going on such as really good seminars and workshops which were actually pretty sweet, but the above things were enough to convince us this is going to be fun.

After all our effort, the morning we were leaving finally came. John, Lou, me and several other friends of ours all piled in the bus that already had some kids on it. These kids were picked up hours before us and we were filling up their bus as a cost saving maneuver. We get on the bus and looked around.

“Pat!” I hear a girl yell. “Hey” another girl yells. John and the guys look at me and John says “How do you know women already? We literally have not even found seats on the bus yet!” “They are family man.” I told him. I see our cousins Nicole and Steph. I get a big hug and so does Lou. I hugged a couple of her female friends and one of her male friends just so he didn’t feel left out, which was really awkward for this guy who looked like a football linebacker and had no idea who I was.

I hear one of their friends ask if I was always like this and if I was single as we get to our seats. I get to sit next to John and right in front of our new friends. This trip was fun, for us anyway. The chaperones told us a lot to calm down and we did, for a bit, and then we got loud again. This was going to be a long bus ride.

When we finally get to the hotel, its later at night, almost 9pm. We all meet in the lobby for the itinerary for the next few days. It looked as though not much started until the next afternoon and we had some free time in the morning. As we all gathered, the head of the diocese youth groups, we’ll call him Bucky, had a meeting with us all in the auditorium. Father David and Paula (the other chaperone who was very awesome in her own right) got us our room keys and then headed up to the stage with the rest of the chaperones.

Bucky turns on the microphone and starts to address everyone. The welcome speech, how excited he is, be on our best behavior, make friends, listen to chaperones and be on our best behavior. He then threw a curfew down on us, 10pm, and said after the meetings everyone was to go to their rooms for the night. Lastly, the epic mall across the street is a no go. No one is to go there.

That last part got the room of roughly 400+ teenagers upset. Most of us have been on a bus for 8-10 hours with our only stop 6-8 hours before our arrival. We were all hungry. So, our group recaps this real quick as he is talking. There was a curfew, go to bed when he is done talking, and no food.

Yeah, that was not going to work for us. The curfew, we would get around that. Go to bed, we would be awake in someone’s room. The mall looks too tempting and they have lazer tag so that rule didn’t apply. The no food though, that had to be addressed.

Bucky had almost finished speaking and took some questions. He shot everything everyone asked down. The food question was repeatedly brought up. Then he called on me, the last question for the night as it was pushing 10pm now.

“Hi, I am Pat from my home district, I just have a quick question.” I said in front of everyone including 40+ adult chaperones on stage with him. “Its been about 8 hours since I ate and being hypoglycemic it won’t be until morning until I eat again. If we can’t order pizza or delivery of some type, how do you suggest I keep my blood sugar up and avoid a medical incident.” I said. Right then, the entire auditorium went silent. Bucky looked at the chaperones and back at me, the only one standing in the crowd and back at the chaperones.

“Fine, you can order delivery, but everyone needs to be in their rooms” he answers and shuts off the microphone and storms off stage. The kids all cheered and we became very popular very quickly. We had just made almost 400 brand new friends in less than five minutes. We were swarmed by grateful teenagers and all was good until Father David came over. I kind of felt bad because it put him in an awkward spot, but he said “Go to your rooms, get some food and we will meet in the morning.” He wasn’t mad, just tired.

We headed up to our rooms and found out our rooms were connected. This was awesome. We ordered the pizza, set up the playstation and got settled. Our view was pretty sweet. We had a balcony which overlooked the mall. Seeing all the lights at night was just beautiful. We were up late, hanging out. We left our door open so we had a lot of visitors throughout the night.

In the morning, we got up and headed to breakfast to meet up with Father David. He decided on a few rules for us. Stay out of trouble, be respectful, no girls in our rooms and be at the workshops and seminars we signed up at. Simple rules. We could follow those. We all really respected Father David so his rules were what we would follow, everything else we looked at as …. optional.

Nothing was planned after breakfast. The activities started around 2pm, which gave us a few hours to have some fun. “We have to check out Laser Tag” John said. “Alright, I’m in, Let’s go” I replied. “Hey guys, we can’t go to the mall, we are not allowed” one of our new friends spoke up. “If you think we are going to let the mall taunt is by being so close and not being allowed to go, you don’t know us well enough yet.”

We had a very large group, 15-20 of us. Most of them stayed at the hotel, but John, myself, Lou and a couple other of the guys decided we were going to the mall. We walked out of the hotel and from the balconies people were asking us where we were going. “Where are you going, we aren’t allowed to go to the mall!” kids yelled. “Yes, we know. We are just going to the mall” I yelled back. We walked up to the street we had to cross. Ah! now it makes sense. This was not a street, this was an 8 lane highway with vehicles moving at high speeds and a busy highway at that.

“John, I just want to point out that last night from the balcony, this street looked less traveled and not as wide.” I said to him. “Hmm” he replied. Lou speaks up “We are all going to die”. “Eventually, so let’s go” I responded.

I am not going to lie here. We were all petrified and for good reason. Four lanes moving one way and four lanes moving the other. Cars were flying by us. There was no break in the middle. It was all or nothing. We knew that was stupid to even try, but we have developed a reputation and kids were watching, the mall had laser tag, and we were limited on time so it was now or never. Never would have been the right choice, just to clarify. We were getting ready to run to our certain death.

This is essentially what stood between us and laser tag!

We waited for an opening. The plan was to sprint across, dodge traffic and end up safely on the other side and walk to the mall. It was a good plan. Simple, direct and to the point.

“Go now” John yelled! I see the opening he did and we run. We run like we are being chased by a bear. We don’t look back and hope everyone makes it. “Oh, s&#/” I hear John say as he gets past the last lane of traffic. He was ahead of me so I was still running across. I looked up to see John tiptoeing, taking long strides and he goes about 8 feet and dives and rolls.

As I crossed the last lane of traffic, I see what made John a ballerina/Indiana Jones. The unexpected grates on the other side of the road that we didn’t know about. These were not just storm grates. These grates were designed to have kids who make horrible decisions, like us, have their life flash before their eyes.

These steel grates were about 8 foot wide and they has cross beams that were angled about a foot apart. Wide enough for a person to fall through into the storm water drain about 15 feet below. That was where we decided to cross.

This but wider.

In a full sprint I hit about three cross beams and dove for the grass to safety. I look up and here came Lou and the last couple guys who used more expletives than if a trucker and sailor were arguing. When we had all finally made it, we sat and just stared at the grates. “Why?” I asked “Just why?”. “I think I might have pooped myself” Lou spoke up. “I didn’t see those from the room” John says.

“Hey guys. Let’s find a different way back.” I said. Everyone agreed as we slowly got up, dusted off and headed to the mall. I am sure laser tag would have been more fun without the previous near death experience. We had felt like we had just cheated death itself and to this day, we have no idea how we all lived through that and hopefully they added walls to prevent stupidity like ours from happening again!

“Lou the Hero of What!”

Blog with Pat-n-Lou

Sports. Sports can bring people together, promote healthy competition or create the ultimate rivalry and animosity between people. When you play sports together as brothers, things can get a little intense at times.

At our younger ages when we were in better shape, and for some of us not our current round shape, we loved to play all different types of sports. Competitively though, it was basketball. There were adult leagues that went on seasonally and we always tried to have a team. We usually finished middle of the pack except for the “What” season.

Yes, our team name was What. This was the greatest team name ever. Listening to teams try to explain who the played the next week or even the current week was just gratifying. The conversations we overheard consistently went like this.

Rival team player: “Who do we play today?”

Second rival team player: “What”

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Canadian Nightclub Part 3: Think Fast…Where is John?

As John was trying to explain to his girlfriend that he didn’t do anything wrong and Brian tried to defend him, I sat quietly in the back of the minivan taxi occupied by John’s girlfriend’s friend. We finally get to the hotel and meet in the lobby with the other guys.

The girls decide they are going to the room. John’s girlfriend is angry and her friend tries to drag me with her by the hand. Brian again saves me and says we need to go the other way and tells her sorry.

The girls head up stairs and John tells us he will be right back. A couple of us smoke outside and when we are done we come back in the lobby where we find our friend Rick asleep in a chair. Epic mistake on as Rick’s part.

We decided to help Rick get up and head to the room. We get him out of the chair and pretty much drag him to the elevator. When the elevator opens, Brian and I think it was Lou go in and set Rick in the corner of the elevator as Rick says he is going to be sick. We had to think fast and find something for Rick to put his head into!

I continued my streak for the night of quick thinking. I dragged the 7′ ficus tree into the elevator and we put Rick’s head on it. We decided then, Rick would have to get off the right floor himself because we were still waiting for John in the lobby. Shu pushed all of the buttons on the elevator and let Rick know just to get off on our floor. Rick grunted into the focus and we assumed that mean ok.

Rick’s ficus was still standing.

We went back to the lobby to wait for John. After a while we heard the ding of the elevator. When we went to check on it, Rick was still there holding the ficus tree. Lou asked him if he was alright and Rick grunted again. Shu again told him to get off on the right floor and pushed all the buttons again.

After Rick and his ficus tree were headed on their floor to floor excursion again, I jumped in the other elevator to go get John. When I got to his room I knocked and his girlfriend answered. She said John left 20 minutes ago. Her friend yelled for me to come lay with her and I yelled in, I am going to go find John and I left. His girlfriend was not very happy.

I went back down to the lobby to meet up with the guys. I found them in the elevator giving Rick options of which ficus he wanted as they had added another on into the elevator. I told the guys we had to go find John and explained he had left. Shu pushed the buttons again, we said goodbye to Rick and went to go look for John.

We headed to the casino. That was the original plan, so John should be at the poker or blackjack tables when we get there. We got to the casino and the guards let us in which was amazing. Shu was slurring his words and I am not sure Lou even knew where we were.

We split up to look for John and we planned to meet back at the door we came in. After about a half hour we met back up and no one had seen John. To be honest, I am not sure the guys even looked for him as most of them lost money while looking for him and Brian was talking to a group of women.

This had to be John dodging his angry girlfriend when we lost him.

A guys decided to go back to the hotel to check on Rick and I was going to keep looking for John. I wondered around the casino a little while longer and still no John. I decided to exchange some more money and go to the poker room because if John was going to show up anywhere it would be there. As I took my chips toward the poker room I see a small crowd around a blackjack table and I hear a Korean lady yelling someone at the table isn’t playing the rules.

I walk over for some entertainment and she is yelling at John. Here he is, at the blackjack table apparently making a poor older Korean woman furious because of how he is choosing to play. I sat and watch for a couple minutes and just laughed. The first hand I saw, John stays at 13. Next hand, John stays at 12. The last hand, John hits at 17 and draws a 3.

When the 3 hit, the Korean woman almost lost her mind. John was done on that table and got up. I walked up to him and said. “We have looking for you for an hour. You decide to just come here and make that lady mad. Really?” John took his chips to the window to change them out and just laughed about the lady at the table.

We left and headed back to the hotel. We walked into the lobby and over to the elevator. We see the two ficus trees and no Rick in the elevator. We head up to John’s room and walk in, trying to be quiet, but I think we woke up the entire floor. We walk in and a couple of the guys are in there, one of the guys was hitting on John’s girlfriends friend and we see a foot coming out of the one foot by 3 foot closet.

I walk over to the closet, open the door and I saw Rick passed out. “I am glad you found him” I said as I shut the door. As I shut the door, I felt arms around my waist. It was John’s girlfriends friend and that was my cue to leave.

Notice the non smile.

The other couple guys and I leave John with his angry girlfriend, her friend and Rick passed out in the closet. When we finally got back to our room it was about 430am and we passed out for about 2 hours. When we got up, we checked out and headed out.

We stopped for breakfast at Denny’s on the way home. We all ordered and our orange juice was served in a glass Carafe with the Denny’s logo on it. I had to have this. It was not for sale and not free. After about 45 minutes of harassing the waitress about this, she finally agreed I could have it. The generous tip she received was well deserved.

We finally made it home and we all just about passed out immediately. That evening, we ended going back out locally but that story, is an entirely different adventure!

The Canadian Nightclub: Think Fast – Part 1

Blog with Pat-n-Lou

I have previously written a brief overview of the guys we are closest with and said we all.grew up together. Well, when you grow up with a great group of friends, you tend to do things and go places just for fun.

We took overnight and weekend trips to Niagra Falls, Canada. There were a few reasons for the excursions. Some of us could legally drink in the USA and some of us couldn’t based on our age range. We could ALL legally drink in Canada.

Clifton Hill. Niagra Falls, Canada.

We were young and all lived at home. Most of us were single and all of us enjoyed hanging out together. So, it worked well for us. Sometimes we would plan the trip and sometimes we would just be bored and decide to go. Either way, it was always fun.

One particular time we went, we had quite the…

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The Canadian Nightclub: Think Fast – Part 2

The night was already adventurous and entertaining. We all decided it was better to go elsewhere at this point, just in case female Wilber’s man decided to come back and look for anyone involved the the men’s room debacle.

Minimalistic clock with Time to GO text. Time to GO lettering. Design element clock silhouette. Isolated on white background.

We gathered everyone up and decided another nightclub was our best course of action. Actually making a group decision in our inebriated state was quite impressive looking back at it now. We all decided on the club down the street but we had to finish the last few shots we had on our table.

Brian gave me two and told me to go say goodbye to the “10” (the most attractive girl in the nightclub). So that’s what I did. She was with her friends as I walked up to them. I said “I really hate to interrupt and I’m sorry. I have two questions if I could?”. They all just looked at me and the one I spoke to earlier replied “I guess I owe you that. Thank you for the shot earlier.” I almost fell over as the girl who repeatedly snubbed men all night, pretty vocally and not very politely, was just pleasant to me. Huh?!

So I speak up and say ” First, I have a shot for you to apologize for bothering you earlier about my buddy. I am sure you get hit on all night and don’t need idiots like me bothering you. So I am sorry. Next, the nightclub down the street is pretty good from what I hear? Is that true?”

All the girls are pretty much in disbelief their friend is be pleasant to me. Almost as much as I am. She responds “That nightclub gets busy as this one dies out like it is now, so about now it will be pretty fun. So you are leaving and going there? So, is this a goodbye shot?”

I am pretty sure my jaw dropped. “Yeah, our group is heading over so I guess I am going with them and so is my buddy.” I somehow said. “Thanks for the info. Oh, and that really is a great bracelet!” I told her as I walked away.

I told the guys what happened and they said the typical guy crap. “She just wants free drinks from you.” ” She just wanted to make sure we we leaving” “She didn’t ask you to stay did she? Didn’t think so.” Anyway, we were off.

On the way to the other nightclub, John’s girlfriend’s friend tells me she’s cold and I offer her my coat. She says “you know I am sure if you put your arm around me we can both stay warm. Other things can do that too.” Alrighty then. So, all the way to the next nightclub, I held her like she asked.

Essentially like this.

We get there, split up and Brian and I find a table. He got a couple beers and he started with the questions. “What’s up with you and her? Taking her home tonight?” I immediately tell him “No, why would I do that. She was cold and asked me…..nevermind. No.” She was very pretty and a very nice girl. We had talked a lot before because our friends were dating so we were friends by association. I never really put thought into dating her until Brian said something. I really didn’t even then to be honest.

We drank for a bit and that was the tipping point. We finally hit the dance floor. As we were dancing with random people, the girl from the previous club spins me around and starts dancing with me. I swear, the entire nightclub stopped, at least that was what it felt like. I didn’t question it and danced until the song ended. Oh, and I can’t dance. Not at all which just made it weirder that this stunning woman was dancing with a guy who looked like he was doing the “African Anteater Ritual”.

“Thanks for the dance. It was fun” I said. “Thank you.” She replied and headed off. I head to the restroom as it hit about 2am. Everyone is getting ready to go when I come out and we head for the door. One small problem, I left my cigarettes on the table. I run back to get them and tell everyone I will meet them outside.

I grab my smokes, head out the doors and run into a group of people surrounding what looks like a fight. I see a couple of my friends toward the middle so I force my way through the crowd to make sure everyone is ok. When I get there, I see John’s girlfriend fighting the attractive girl everyone was watching all night. This was not a foreseen turn of events, obviously.

I see John trying to find an opening to stop the fight and his girlfriend’s friend was also trying to find an opening to stop it. I had to think fast. What is the best way to stop two girls from fist fighting in the middle of the sidewalk. I got it!!!!

I literally jumped between the two woman, spread them apart for a brief second and kiss the attractive girl from the bar. Everyone stopped. No more fighting, no more cheering and not more screaming. After a moment I could hear people asking my friends if I know her? Is she my girlfriend? What just happened? How can he just kiss her like that?

So, this was not just a kiss. I grabbed her close and kissed her pretty passionately. She first just stopped. Then she grabbed me close and started kissing me back. We walked back a few steps until her back was up against the wall and just kissed. ( Well, I will keep it PG here. ) Pretty much until the crowd dissipated. When we stopped I said “Hi. You’re welcome for the shot.” She replied “Shots, plural!” And ran her hand through the back of my hair and pulled me in to kiss me again.

While this is all going on with me, I can hear John trying to calm down his girlfriend and he literally said to her, “I have no idea what Pat’s doing.” Then I hear Brian talking to her friend “I figured you wanted him to go with you, I should probably break this up.” her told her. “That would be nice. Maybe he will kiss me like that!” she says to Brian.

To all of my friends credit, I knew they wanted to go and wanted me to stop but I took my hand, held it out holding up one finger as I was kissing her and they stalled for a bit longer. I really do love my friends!

When I had come up for air after a few minutes, Brian said “Pat, let’s go, the taxi is here.” The girl I was kissing said “Wow, just wow. He can stay with me tonight. I will have him back to you in the morning!” Brian grabbed me by the shoulder and said, time to go and I went. I did say good by and thank you as we walked away. Her friends surrounded her and asked her if she was ok and her response made me feel pretty good. “I am amazing right now” she told them.

We piled in the taxi’s as John’s girlfriend was still super mad. I sat all the way in the back of the van by myself and the other guys, except for John and Brian, rode in the second van. So as John was getting yelled at by his girlfriend and Brian was trying to explain he didn’t do anything wrong, her friend made her way into the very back with me, unnoticed. She sat on my lap and said to me “so, at least you get to go home with a girl tonight” and she started kissing me.

I know Brian noticed because he tried to nonchalantly break us up. Then, John must have noticed because about two seconds later I heard from the front of the van from John’s girlfriend “Are you kidding me? Are all of your trips up here like this? How many people does he go home with in a night?”

The reality of it all was, I went home with no one, ever. Even if there were offers, I passed. That’s not me. This night though, I broke up a fight and just sat in the back of a van, how was I wrong here?

The night gets even more interesting and fun. Stay tuned for Part 3. Spoiler, John goes MIA and more.

The Canadian Nightclub: Think Fast – Part 1

I have previously written a brief overview of the guys we are closest with and said we all.grew up together. Well, when you grow up with a great group of friends, you tend to do things and go places just for fun.

We took overnight and weekend trips to Niagra Falls, Canada. There were a few reasons for the excursions. Some of us could legally drink in the USA and some of us couldn’t based on our age range. We could ALL legally drink in Canada.

Clifton Hill. Niagra Falls, Canada.

We were young and all lived at home. Most of us were single and all of us enjoyed hanging out together. So, it worked well for us. Sometimes we would plan the trip and sometimes we would just be bored and decide to go. Either way, it was always fun.

One particular time we went, we had quite the group. Lou and I were joined by John and his girlfriend at the time, her best friend, Brian, I believe Dave and Rick, Shu may have been there and there may have been others but I don’t recall them if there were.

We took a few cars to get there and get to our hotel. We never drove in Canada. We always got a.hotel close to the strip (bars, casino, museums, sight seeing…a stretch of road we just called the strip) and we parked in the hotel lot. Usually we walked everywhere, but every once in a while we would call on whatever poor taxi would pick us up. They had no idea what they were getting when we got in their vehicle.

The caravan of cars making the trip!

This particular trip, which was uncommon for the girls to be there, got a little bit out of hand. Now, let me explain something real quick. Some women can tend to get a little jealous and when you add alcohol into the equation, it can become bad quickly, but that was later in the night.

We started this trip as we did most trips. First to the hotel to check in. Next, to the casino to exchange American money for Canadian money. Next, we head to a local bar, “The Down Under” to avoid all the American tourists.

So many tourists…ugh.

The Down under was our place to be back then. It was literally under some shops with a sign about the size of a street sign. This place was always busy and 90% of the clientele was locals. We always had fun and enjoyed our nights when we went there. They had a dance floor, a couple different bars and plenty of seating so it worked well for our group.

On this night though, we had no idea what was in store for us. We got to the Down Under and sort of split up a bit. Brian and I went off and found a table and John and the guys went dancing with the girls and got a bigger table a few feet away from us. With everyone on the dance floor, Brian and I were just hanging out having a couple beers.

Things then made a turn for the worse. Waitresses with trays of $1 shots. OH NO! They have found my Kryptonite!!! The first waitress gets to Brian and my table and asks us if we would like one. I buy her out. She had about 5 left and I gave her a $10. I asked her to come back and start with us on her next tray. She agrees and Brian and I polish of the 5 shots I bought.

The very polite and speedy waitress returns with a tray of about 30 shots. I give her a $50 and ask her to come back with another tray in 1/2 an hour. Since she is keeping the change, she agrees. There were a few people getting made I did that, but were American’s is our defense.

Brian and I were discussing several things at our table including one girl dancing alone that I thought was an easy 10. Brian thought 9 but we agreed to disagree. We both did agree she was hands down the most attractive girl in this packed nightclub. So, Brian suggests I share a shot with her and it sounds like a good idea at the time. So I did.

I took two shots and walked across the dance floor to offer this girl who I think is out of my league a shot. As I approached, she literally tells a guys to back off, she’s not trying to meet a man tonight and tells another guy to get lost, she is good by herself. My thoughts as I approached, “Huh. Whatever. They are not me.” That’s not confidence. That’s stupidity amplified by alcohol.

I approach her and say two things. First “That bracelet is amazing. It compliments you well.” Before she can say anything I spit out “Oh, this is for you. My buddy thinks your hot. I won’t let you drink alone so …. Cheers!” Sure enough, she takes the shot, says nothing, I take the empty glass and head back to the table where Brian has met a brand new Canadian friend. We will call him Wilbur.

Wilbur is that annoying, unwelcome house guest that won’t leave. Brian and I would start a conversation and he just jumped in without having a clue about what Brian and I were discussing. After about 20 min of him, we knew Wilbur needed other friends and a different table.

Wilbur decided to head to the bar and Brian and I discussed non rude ways to help Wilbur leave our table he invited himself to. We had no pleasant way to do this. We were stuck.

While Wilbur was in line at the bar, we were approached by a female. She walked up, visibly intoxicated and asked Brian and I if we were single. This woman was wearing a tiny skirt, tiny top and a ton of makeup. She had blonde hair and was a larger woman, more or less she was about Brian’s and my weight combined and shrunk to a 4’8″ frame. To top it off, she was the the aggressive female version of Wilbur.

She went to get a drink and told Brian and I she would be right back. I took that as a threat and went to check on John and everyone. I stopped by, said hi and used the restroom. Next thing I know Wilbur walks in and starts talking to me.

See the rules?

Guys are not like women. We have our rules and urinal conversation is in direct violation of these rules. I am American and there will be no peeing conversation going on here!

I became annoyed. Wilber is now stalking me in the restroom, he wouldn’t stop talking and going back to the table to the female Wilber is a bad option. I finish up, wash my hands and head out of the restroom relatively quickly. As a walk out, directly in front of the door, there stood female Wilbur with her arm across the door blocking my path!

“Justin said you’d be here.” she says to me. “Wait, what?” I thought. Why is she here and who the heck is Justin? I looked over to the table and there sits Brian waving at me with a smile saying – that’s all you, sorry. “Really, I thought we were friends!” I yelled to him across the bar.

This girl was aggressive, inebriated, and in heat apparently. I am stuck between the Wilburs and needed to think fast. “Oh, there you are! Our friend was looking for you. He has been checking you out all night and he is too shy to tell you how he really feels. He is the really hot guy at our table. He was at the bar when you stopped by.” I told her.

She responds, “Oh, I know who you mean. I will help him get past being shy. Where did studmuffin go?” At this point, 99.9% of the time, I point out Lou or John or Rick or Dave. This was the .01% and I am sorry Wilbur. “He just went in there and the first thing he asked was if you were in there so he could say hi.”

She moved me out of the way, said “I am not shy and he won’t be when I am done with him” and she darted right into the men’s room. I was shocked! I headed back to the table, watching the door and saw two guys walk in and then immediately out. By the time I got back to the table, I was laughing so hard I was crying and it took me almost 15 minutes to explain to Brian what just happened.

No, she wasn’t.

The guys had come over to ask Brian and I what was going on and neither of us could talk through our laughter. About another 15 minutes went by and male Wilbur finally walked out of the men’s room. He is absolutely destroyed. His shirt has 1 button actually buttoned in the wrong hole. His belt is just hanging through one loop on his pants which were unbuttoned and he was holding them up. His hat was gone and for some reason he was carrying a sock. He also had lipstick all over his face and neck.

Wilbur look liked he was just attacked by a female gorilla who was wearing lipstick. His facial expression was of absolute shock and terror. He put his head down and slowly walked across the bar to the door. Brian and I were stunned and still laughing. Now we waited about 2 minutes still watching the door.

Female Wilber exits. The door opens and she fell against the door frame using it to hold her up and holding the door open with her other hand. Her top was half up covering half of her bra. Her skirt was lifted really high on one side revealing way too much. Her lipstick was smeared all over her face and she was wearing male Wilbur’s hat sideways. What happened next was completely unpredictable.

A 6’3″ very buff, bald and angry man spots female Wilbur and everyone hears “Where have you been? My girl just disappears and I find her in the men’s room door way! We are leaving right now!” We had no idea. This man picked up female Wilbur and carried her out. Stunned in disbelief, Brian and I just sat there. Still laughing, but a great deal less then we were.

The night only got better from there. Stay tuned for Part Two.

The Life of a Bills Fan

There is nothing like being a Buffalo Bills fan. It has been an emotional rollercoaster since I’ve been about twelve.

Every Year!!

As a Bills fan, you remember so many moments. The good, the bad and the painful. Wide right, the comeback, the Music City Miracle, the Terell Owen’s debacle, and perhaps the greatest moment in recent history…..The Pegula family!! Thank You Terry and Kim!!

There is always hope though. That’s the one thing that a true Bills fan always has and usually never loses. The Bills could be 1-6, but if they are still mathematically in the playoff hunt, there is hope!


Hope is a Bills fan’s greatest strength (Tailgating is an extremely close second). Hope drives us to the games. Hope is why we scream at the TV. Hope is why we watch the Patriots play the Bills twice a year. Why can’t Brady retire already?

Deep love for the franchise is driven by hope. Bills fans are not fair weather fans. We are there through the highs and the lows. Some fans from other teams can’t name players on their team or if their team is losing they root for someone else, while Biils fans will tailgate in 0° weather in a snowstorm with 25mph winds (I have been there).


We are all part of #Billsmafia. It’s a name that the national media uses as it refers to the Bills fans. As bad as a reputation we get sometimes as it’s made out to be, Bills fans do their part and more in the community with actions driven by the team. Ask Andy Daulton how much we love our team. Thank You Andy!

The well deserved curtain call at New Era field.

Every Sunday we will root for our team. We will yell and scream at the stadium or at our homes. We will support our team through thick and thin regardless of the record. The Bills have the chance every week to go 1-0 and that is the outcome we will hope for.

I will also add, no one Circles the Wagons like the Buffalo Bills.


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